How To Care For The Caregiver

More than 65 million family caregivers—29% of the U.S. adult population—provide an average of 20 hours of care per week; some provide care around the clock. The physical and emotional toll can be overwhelming. So how can you nurture yourself as the caregiver?

1. Seek support from other caregivers. There are great benefits from knowing that there’s a network of other caregivers you can turn to for encouragement and problem-solving.

2. Take care of your own health. You need rest, healthy food, plenty of water, and time away—whether it’s taking a walk, meeting a friend for a movie, or taking a nap.

3. Keep your own doctor appointments. Let your doctor know that you are a caregiver and be sure to mention any signs of depression (e.g., overeating or loss of appetite; difficulty concentrating, remembering details, and making decisions; feelings of hopelessness).

4. Be flexible. Why argue for 30 minutes to get your loved one to wear matching socks only to realize that you went out with your own shirt on backward?

5. Keep things in perspective and embrace humor whenever possible. 

6. Realize that there is no “perfect” way to be a caregiver except by providing the most love and patience you can gather that day.

7. Look for helpful online resources, such as the Alzheimer’s Association (www.alz.org), the National Institute on Aging (www.nia.nih.gov), or the National Alliance for Caregiving (caregiving.org).

8. Consider seeking respite care. Besides residential facilities, there are day and drop-in centers for adults, and in-home services that can take some burden off caregivers. You can call your local aging care offices or research options online at eldercare.acl.gov. While your loved one may be resistant at first, they may actually enjoy the opportunity to be around peers.  

9. Know that even if they don’t know who you are, you know who they are.

10. Most importantly, remember that caregiving often calls us to lean into love we didn’t know possible.